Chapter 4
4
Iwake up with a headache that I’m not so affectionately naming Aston. I guess that’s what happens when you go to sleep annoyed.
After climbing out of bed, I use the bathroom and brush my teeth, all the while mentally ranting to myself. But really, what does it matter if he’s going to be working with me? He doesn’t seem to care about the kiss. He even called me immature for still lingering on it. Maybe he’s right. I was a bit drunk that night. I kissed a man whom I thought was a stranger in the dark. It turned out it wasn’t. Case closed.
I’m not going to let it have power over me. That’s become my mantra where men are concerned, and it’s now extending to Aston. You can’t have a new reality with an old mentality, so here I am. I’ll see him at work, and we’ll be indifferent, just as I told Braelyn we’d be, and that’s that.
With that mental declaration, I head downstairs. The best part of no longer living with Josh is my freedom. And the lack of constant fear. I was having eczema under my eyes, GI symptoms, back and neck pain, and occasionally palpitations. I wasn’t sleeping and was jittery and nervous all the time. Afraid to eat something I wanted or listen to music I liked or dress how I wanted or not wear makeup.
I was afraid of my boyfriend, and to have that behind me is the best feeling in the world.
Life of a Showgirl streams through the speakers because it’s that kind of morning. I make myself scrambled eggs with turkey sausage and eat them while sipping on my second cup of coffee. The moment I’m done with all of that and have cleaned up the kitchen, I plop my ass down on the sofa to eat my chocolates with a fire blazing in the fireplace and put on Kill Bill: Volume 1 with the intention of watching Volume 2 before this day is over.
“Just the three of us,” I sing to my candy and coffee, but then I hear an odd sound at the front door before the lock disengages. I jump up and freeze with my arms and legs spread wide like that cat getting electrocuted in Christmas Vacation. I search around for a weapon, wishing I had one of Uma Thurman’s swords, when the door opens.
My heart thunders. Who the hell is here?
People are talking. I grip my mug tighter, ready to chuck it at someone’s head if I must. The chocolates are useless. But then two suitcases are shoved through the open door, rolling until they bump into the foyer’s wall, but I don’t notice them so much because now I’m staring at Aston and the small person who I suspect is his daughter.
“Hi,” I shriek, feeling like I got caught being somewhere I shouldn’t be, only to remember that I live here. “What are you doing here? How’d you get in p>
Aston looks like he’s been struck, blinking about five times. He adjusts his backward navy baseball cap until it’s facing forward, with a 617 in a shamrock on the front. So Boston, and it would turn me on if I hadn’t decided I hate him. His gaze snags on my bare legs and oversized college shirt as he gives me a once-over similar to the way he did last night.
Only instead of a cute dress and hot-as-fuck platform heels that give my five-foot-two frame six or so extra inches, he’s getting me braless, wearing cream shearling Birkenstock slippers, no makeup, and a high, messy bun.
“Um.” He glances down at the little version of himself, who’s wearing a Disney’s Rapunzel dress, then back up at me. “What are you doing here p>
“I asked you first p>
He grunts, less than amused. “Micha offered for us to move in here since he’s likely not coming back anytime soon. And I’ve had a spare key to his place for years p>
Brothers. I fucking swear. “That’s hilarious since he told me I could move in here six weeks ago when I broke up with my boyfriend.” Then I remember a vague detail from last night before the martinis started pouring down my throat. “Forest said you were staying with your parents p>
“I was. I mean, we were. Then I spoke to Micha on Thursday, and he offered us his place p>
“But I live here,” I protest, sounding like I’m six and not caring in the slightest. The little girl is eyeing me like I’m a villain in her not-so-happily-ever-after, and I remember that her mom died. “Hi,” I say, coming over to her and ignoring her father. And the way I look because fuck him. No more fear. “I’m Skylar. You can call me Sky p>
She glances up at the ceiling before returning to me. “Sky? I’ve never heard that name before. Do you have rainbows? I like rainbows p>
I think I might love her. “All women have rainbows. We just have to find the sun through the rain in order to see them p>
“Are you a philosopher now p>
I covertly flip off her father without removing my eyes from her.
She studies me and sticks out her hand to me. “I’m Zoey p>
I shake her surprisingly firm grip. “Hi, Zoey. I’m Micha’s sister and hopefully the bane of your father’s existence p>
He grunts, but I continue to ignore him.
“Why are you in our new house p>
“That’s my question.” I glare at her father. “My question for you. Do you have a middle name p>
“Huh?” he blusters at the random question.
“A middle name,” I repeat.
“Oliver p>
I snort a laugh. “You’re kidding me? Your middle name is after my uncle Oliver p>
He shrugs.
“I can’t name my headache Aston Oliver Hughes p>
“What p>
He’s looking at me like I’m crazy. Right now, I might be.
He sighs and shifts his weight, releasing his daughter’s hand to pull out his phone. He puts it on speakerphone as he dials up my brother’s number, and it does that wacky international ring with an elongated beep and a click about five times before Micha picks up.
“Hey!” he greets Aston. “Any trouble getting in p>
“You mean other than the fact that your sister is squatting here p>
“I am not squatting!” I snap indignantly.
“Oh, shit p>
“Uncle Micha!” Zoey scolds.
“Sorry! Crap. Take me off speaker and hand me to my sister p>
Aston does exactly that, and I snatch the phone and turn my back to them as I head into the kitchen so they can’t hear me eviscerate my brother. “What in the absolute fuck did you do p>
“I messed up. I told Aston that he and Zoey could live in my house because it’s unoccupied p>
“It’s not unoccupied p>
“Yes. That’s where I messed up. I completely and totally forgot you moved in after you broke up with Dickface p>
“So, what am I supposed to do? Move out? I have to move out p>
“Nooooo. Don’t move out. You can’t. You have to stay p>
My hand flails about. “How p>
“I don’t know, but I can’t kick out my sister, who just broke up with an abusive man, or my best friend and godchild, who just lost her mother p>
“This doesn’t work. Not even a little.” And he doesn’t even know the half of it. I lean my hip against the counter and change the phone to my other ear. “It’s weird, Micha. I can’t live here with Aston and his daughter p>
“Why not p>
“Because I don’t even like him p>
“I heard that,” Aston yells.
“You’re not supposed to be listening,” I fire back. “See what I mean,” I say, returning to Micha as I walk in a circle between the stove and the island. “I can’t live with him p>
Except Micha’s laughing. “Why don’t you like him p>
Um, how about because he called me immature and a mistake? I go with the second half of my truth. “Because he’s an insufferable, arrogant dick and always has been p>
He sighs. “Sky, Zoey already has a bedroom at my house, and it’s near her preschool p>
Hmm. I was wondering why one of the bedrooms had a pink princess theme, but then again, this is Micha we’re talking about, and I assumed it had been there when he bought the place and was too lazy to redo it.
“There are three bedrooms, so it’s not like you’ll have to share. You can still do whatever it is you do, as long as it’s not an asshole or a rando in my house p>
“Tell me you’re kidding p>
“On that, no p>
I stop my circling. “I’m twenty-five. Like you weren’t screwing random women at my age p>
“That’s not up for discussion p>
“Micha p>
“Fine. You’re twenty-five. I respect that. Kind of. Not really. You’re still my baby sister and should be a virgin until marriage or death. But I won’t have to worry about that because Aston will be there, and he’ll be my chastity policeman for you on my behalf p>
“Micha p>
“Stop saying my name like that. Come on, Sky. Aston will be doing his single-dad doctor thing, and you’ll be doing your single-girl nursing thing. You’ll hardly overlap. It’s not good to live in such a big place by yourself. It’ll make me feel better to know you’re not living there alone p>
“You didn’t even remember I was living here p>
“That’s because I work sixteen-hour shifts in ridiculous conditions, and some days I barely remember my name, let alone what a hot shower feels like. I messed up. But this could be beneficial for everyone. What do you care if Aston and his daughter live there with you p>
Um, how about a lot? I care a lot. But hell, I can’t say that now, can I? He thinks Aston and I are indifferent or simply prickly toward each other because that’s exactly what we’re supposed to be and always have been since I accidentally threw up on him and he treated me like a brat.
“I’m sure he won’t be an asshole. In fact, I’ll tell him not to be. It’ll be good for Zoey to have another female around. She just lost her mother p>
I can’t live with Aston, but what freaking choice do I have short of moving out today, which isn’t exactly possible? And what would be my excuse for running out so fast, especially when he’s asking me to be there for a little girl who just lost her mother? Maybe I’m the one making too big a deal out of the kiss. It was two years ago, and he didn’t seem flustered by it. Not the least bit rattled. To him, it was a mistake and nothing more.
And last night when he came over to the table, he teased me for a few minutes, chatted with the guys, then excused himself and left. That was that. It wasn’t a thing. I’m the one making it so.
“Micha p>
“Please. For me,” he begs. “Aston is a single dad. It’s a lot. Zoey is five and living in a new city where she has no friends. They need you. You’re a pediatric nurse. This is what you do. You help kids in need p>
“You’re hitting below the belt p>
“Actually, I’m hitting your ooey, gooey, soft, sweet-as-spun-sugar heart. Do this for me. Do this for Zoey p>
I clench my jaw and close my eyes. “I hate you p>
“You’re the best. I love you. Put Aston back on the phone p>
With a blustery sigh, I head back over to him. Zoey is doing small twirls, so the bottom of her dress flares out, using Aston’s hand above her head to guide her along. I used to do those with Micha when I was little. Micha—and Aston—are ten years older than me. I liked having an older brother. I still do. Even when he’s acting a bit too overprotective.
“Micha wants to talk to you. Zoey and I can hang out if you want privacy.” I hand him back his phone, and without a response, he storms into the kitchen.
“I don’t think Daddy is happy you live here,” Zoey tells me in that blunt way kids are.
“Tough noogies on him p>
She scrunches her nose, not fully understanding.
“Would it be weird for you if I lived here too? At least for a little while p>
She shrugs. “Will you sleep in my room or play with my toys p>
I try to hold in my smile. “Nope. Not unless you have really awesome toys and tell me I can play with them first p>
She juts her hip out. “Then I’m cool with it p>
“You’re kind of a sassy pants, aren’t you p>
“Daddy says I have the mouth of a troublemaker p>
Now there’s no holding back my smile. “I do too. I think we’ll be fast friends p>
“How come you don’t like Daddy p>
“Grown-up reasons.” And because I need to change the subject from that. “You’ve stayed here before, huh p>
She nods vigorously. “Uncle Micha has a princess room for me. It’s my favorite.” Then she frowns, her body sinking in on itself. “Other than my old room at my mom’s and stepdad’s p>
I didn’t know she had a stepdad. I wonder if he’s still in the picture.
“I get that. Moving is hard. I moved recently too. It’s not fun p>
She shakes her blonde head, her curls bouncing. Other than the dark eyes, she looks so much like Aston. I never met his ex-wife, so I have no clue what she looked like.
“What was your favorite thing about your old room p>
“My rainbow fairy lights and my pictures p>
“We can make some new pictures if you want. I love to draw, and I’m pretty good at it p>
A smile lights up her face, but before she can say anything, her father comes back over and interrupts us. “Can I talk to you?” Aston asks, a hard edge to his voice.
“Sure.” I smile sweetly at him, which makes his jaw twitch a little. Fun.
“Zo-Zo, you can go up to your room. I’ll come get you in a few minutes p>
“Okay. Bye, Sky.” She jumps up to give me a high five.
“Bye, Zoey. It was fun meeting you p>
She scampers up the stairs, and I turn to Aston, only to have him grab me by my arm and drag me back into the kitchen. “You’re not wearing pants p>
“Your powers of observation are masterful p>
He gives me an unimpressed look.
I throw my hands up in the air. “Get over it. You weren’t supposed to be here. I was alone. It’s not like my ass is showing. Either look or don’t p>
He grunts. “Micha said he can’t kick you out.” He paces in front of me. “But we can’t live here together. You know that, right p>
I huff a breath. “I already live here, Aston. I have been for six weeks.” And this house has become my sanctuary. My happy place. It’s a home I feel good and safe being in.
He stops and stands over me, staring down at me as an aggravated growl hits his lips. Before I can comprehend what he’s doing, he grasps my hips and lifts me until I’m seated on the counter.
“What the hell?” I swat his hands away.
“You’re too damn short to have this conversation with. This is better p>
I roll my eyes, fold my arms, and cross my knees, which covers my underwear but manages to hike up my shirt even more. Something I’m positive he notices. “I don’t like being manhandled without my permission p>
That pulls him up short, and he tilts his head. “What does that mean? You like being manhandled when you do give permission p>
I honestly said it as a joke, but it sounds kind of hot in the right situation with the right guy. “None of your business p>
He sighs. “Skylar, these past six months have been hell. Zoey’s mother died, and her stepfather decided he didn’t want any parenting responsibility for Zoey and essentially booted her out of their house the week Astrid died. I punched him out at the funeral because he had it coming, and I wasn’t in the best mental state, and my kid was heartbroken on top of being heartbroken. I broke his jaw, and because he’s a lawyer and a dick, he had me arrested for assault and then dragged me through court over it. I had to deal with that and with Child and Family Services coming into my home to make sure Zoey was safe. Can you imagine that? All of that turmoil and upheaval for a five-year-old? Everything is finally settled, and now we’re here, trying to restart our lives, but so are you, and now my best friend is telling me you have to stay p>
I get it. He’s hurting, and they’ve been through unspeakable pain over the last six months. I’m not insensitive to that, especially for Zoey. But that doesn’t stop me from feeling rubbed raw and left outside naked. I don’t even know if that makes sense, but that’s how it’s been for me with nearly every guy in my life. Not my friends and not my father or even Micha. They’re men.
I’m talking about guys. Teased and belittled and made to feel small and insignificant. My entire life, that’s how it’s been for me. I was in a bad relationship for longer than I should have been with a guy who wasn’t good to me. With a guy who repeated the same bad behavior others did throughout my life, only worse, while gaslighting me and telling me he loved me. Then he started getting aggressive. It took a while, but I left him. I’m here, and for the first time in my life, I feel strong, capable, and in control.
Now the guy who gave me the best kiss of my life at a party two years ago, the same guy who called me a drunken mistake, is trying to kick me out onto the street.
“Where do you propose I go?” I ask in a small but unmistakably bitter voice. I don’t want to cry, but this morning took a miserable turn for me.
“Your parents p>
I laugh. “Why don’t you go back to your parents p>
“I can’t live with my parents, Skylar. I’m a thirty-five-year-old dad. Zoey needs consistency and familiarity right now, and this house is it. Her bedroom upstairs is it. Micha was going to sell me the house because he doesn’t need it or want something so big when he’s here a couple of months out of the year p>
I frown. Micha never offered to sell me the house. I would have bought it from him.
“I can’t live with my parents either,” I tell him flatly.
But I also don’t want to live with him. Zoey is cool, and I like her, but her father is a dick. A gorgeous dick but still a dick nonetheless. Maybe it’s better this way. Maybe it’s time I go out and find my own place and make it all mine and start living my best girl life.
“I need two months to find something else. It’s not up for negotiation. If you don’t like it, feel free to leave p>
I hop off the counter and head toward the family room to get my candy and shut off my movie. I’m going to shower and get the hell out of here for a while. Go clear my head and do some deep thinking.
I spin back around. “And Aston? Your daughter, I like. But not you. Stay the hell away from me. I only make mistakes once. Never twice p>